Happy Father's Day to me!

This photo of my stepdad and me was taken at my daughter's wedding. I don't know what was so hilarious, but clearly we were having a good time.



I didn't have a "daddy" till I was nearly 40. Then I received an enormous blessing: my mom married Joe Ammons. For the first time, I experienced unconditional love, approval, and support from a man in my life. He has stood up for me through incredibly tough times. He's always available with any assistance I need, from shopping for a used car for my kids to a cup of coffee and a good laugh. I could never give him a fraction of what he has given me. Thank you for 20 years of kindness, warmth, and joy. I hope we have at least 20 more together. I love you, Dad!

Phew!

The big day is over, the guests have gone, my youngest daughter is a married woman. The day was wonderful and made so much easier in every way by my precious friends, who are loving wonder-women. Most of the problems were good ones. We originally planned on 20 to 25 people. Just before the big day, the number expanded to close to 40 -- a big crowd for my tiny house. In the end, there were something more than 50 guests. We had people standing in the bathrooms. Really. It was so crowded that people could hardly move. They were drinking soft drinks with no ice because they couldn't see the ice chest two feet away. They couldn't circulate to get food or cake, so friends started grabbing platters and passing out snacks. And after the crowd left, we found the basket of favors, untouched, on a low table. They were overlooked amid the crush.

So I don't think we can say that the event was comfortable for our wonderful guests. But all of us were touched and honored by the outpouring of love for Codie and Corey.

There are so many stories to be told. And as soon as I have a nap or two, I'll start telling them.

Thank you to everyone who helped make this day so memorable through their presence, their prayers, and their wishes. I'm so proud.

Big, wonderful changes

Codie and Corey attended Codie's big brother's wedding yesterday, and big, wonderful changes came out of that event. The issues that led to the extended-family-drama associated with the original wedding plans were resolved. So, with the wedding seven days away, Codie called me on her way home yesterday to say that her dad and stepmother and siblings and spouses will be attending Codie's wedding after all. Furthermore, her dad will walk her down the aisle, her brother will stand up with Corey, and her sister Rachel will be her maid of honor.

Codie started listing the changes that are needed. More corsages, more boutonnieres, another bouquet. Oh, and she loved the punch at her brother's wedding, so could we have that? This call came as I was cleaning carpets and feeling like there's just not enough time to get everything done. I think I held it together okay, though.

Luckily, the florist made Codie a "tossing bouquet" -- same flowers as her bouquet but slightly smaller. It will be perfect for Rachel to carry. Flowers for the men should be no problem at all. And I'm thinking I can pick up a few plain white corsages in case we don't have enough of the florist-made ones. Since Corey's grandmothers may not be able to come, we may have plenty anyway.

As for punch and food...well, those plans are already in place and we'll just go ahead with them. It's a bit late in the day to change the menu. But I think it will be fine.

The best bit of news: Codie said Rachel would like to take part in decorating the house on Friday. Then she said, "Mom, if it wouldn't make you too uncomfortable, Rachel was wondering whether she could just spend the night here on Friday so she can help me on my wedding day." I nearly burst into tears. My older daughter has avoided all contact with me since she was 13. She's 21 now. I cannot think of anything more wonderful than having her here to share her little sister's wedding. I have to be careful how I react, though, because of all the sensitivities in the family. I don't want to take a chance on scaring her off.

I told Codie that Rachel is welcome to participate in everything we're doing. Would she like to get her nails done with us on Friday? And get her hair done by Joy on Saturday morning? Rachel decided to do her own hair, but she will go with us for manicures and pedicures. This makes my heart sing. I don't know whether she'll want to interact with me at all, but I'll have the chance to be near her for the first time in 8 years. I can hardly believe it.

The irony is that we had planned to have the wedding at the Maumelle community center. But when Codie's other family decided not to come, Codie cancelled those plans, moved the wedding date up by three months, and decided to have just a tiny little ceremony in my living room. It looks as if she's going to have her big wedding, after all -- in a very small venue, but still.

My only prayer is that it is a happy day for Codie and Corey in every way. If I can make that happen, then it will have been a Mom-job well done.